why I can't renounce my faith

I was brought up in a Christian home, went to church with my family all through childhood and adolescence, I was baptised and confirmed, went to sunday school and youth group.  We said grace at dinner in my house, taking the Lord's name in vain was deeply frowned upon, I always had a bible of my own and an understanding of christianity that was a combination of what my parents told me, what I learned in church and what I came to find on my own. I never viewed my relationship with God or with the church as "religion" 
As I grew up and developed my own sense of self, I also developed a personal relationship with God and my own faith. I was never forced or brainwashed, I was always happy to attend church and other events with my youth group or family or other christian friends  I was more than comfortable to indentify as a Christian. As a teenager I became quite bold in my faith, outspoken and passionate, I was chapel captain in my final year of high school and leader at my local youth group. I spent my friday nights running games nights at church and looked forward to it each week. My faith has always been very real and personal, and I have always been and still am, quite offended when others claim that Christians are "blind followers" or "naive" or uneducated. In the last few years, my outward "christianness" has become tepid, I no longer go to church and there is less certainty to my belief system. However I maintain that I still have a faith and a belief in the higher power I call God, and there are several reasons why I still hold onto that, why I would never totally renounce my faith. I have never considered myself to be agnostic or atheist. I am not totally closed off to my original beliefs.  

The first and most important of these reasons is that the higher power I call God never fails to provide me with evidence that he is real and present in my day to day life. I have a very clear memory from my early childhood- I must have been about 4 years old- when my grandmother was explaining the concept of prayer to me. She showed me an article in the newspaper about a sick little girl whose father couldn't afford her treatment. My grandma told me that I should include this girl in my prayers, and I did pray that night that God would help her dad find money to pay for her treatment. A short time after this, there emerged the news that this little girl's father had found a way to pay for her treatment and she was better. That has stayed with me my whole life.  I still pray every night for safety and peace, and every morning I wake unharmed and rested. I also pray before an important event; an exam or job interview that I do well, and if nothing else it always calms me and I am able to proceed with a clear head and confidence.  

I have been extremely blessed particularly in finding jobs- I am never out of work and timing between ending one job and finding a new one is always perfect in terms of what I need at a particular time. I also find that whenever I'm feeling lost or alone, I discover people who seem to be placed in my path for the exact purpose of providing guidance or support, or even a kind word that is perfectly suited to my needs at that time. I feel- and judge me all you want, but I firmly believe I have guardian angels wherever I go. 

These signs are too obvious to ignore. It would be simply ignorant to deny that I am not being taken care of by someone or something that is bigger than all of us. 

This is not an evangelical post. I believe that faith is something personal and different for each individual.  Whether it is a complete way of life or something that comforts is entirely down to your own personal beliefs. But this is an explanation for why I belief in something.  And why I won't stop.