a confession.

i tell myself what i tell others.
co-dependence makes me sick.
i'm afraid of commitment.
i don't want anyone, don't need anyone. i don't have the time, the energy.
i'm too selfish.
i can't prioritise someone like that in my life.
i'm happy on my own.

but in truth? i guess i just tell myself all these things, to protect my heart.
because the reality is too hard to look in the eye. 
it's called a pursuit for a reason. it's difficult to attain. 
and at great cost. i can't afford those costs. 

but what i really want?
what i'm afraid to want, because i know i can't have it?









i want the fairytale.