i think i apologise too much for things that i shouldn't be sorry for...and i think i don't apologise enough for the things i am deeply sorry for. someone once told me off for saying sorry too much...to which i replied "sorry".
i don't want to have to apologise for the way i feel, or who i am. so many people do that, and it's not right. and yet, its so hard to admit when we are really in the wrong. and when we do manage to apologise at the right time, it doesn't come across the way we need it to. it either sounds hollow, shallow, reluctant, cliched, all or none of the above. i hate grovelling, it's such a chore, and i think i do it just to keep the peace rather than continue fighting.
but then it backfires on me because i become a doormat and then i can't win either way. but it's not about winning. oh, the frustration of it all...
now my stomach is begging for sustenance so i must away to the kitchen. sorry, for ending this post so abrubtly.
"Just looking for some answers in a world that answers none of them at all"
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