disappointment.
like a heavy anchor on a sinking ship,
dragging it down to the bottom of the ocean,
a dark, uncertain abyss.
can't breathe. vision blurs,
a whirlpool there and then - gone.
one word floats to the forefront
of my spinning head:
failure.
unlike a cold, sharp slap to the face,
this ache is a dull one,
the old familiar fear returning.
if i could do it over, i would.
but then, i don't think i'd know how.